When John and I were boys, a child gained self esteem by accomplishing new and ever increasingly difficult tasks, not just school work, but more importantly, the work you did to help around the house or the farm. Remember the time yer parent would not let you quit doing a job until you did it right(even if it meant till dark), an important (maybe the most) lesson to learn, and just as important it created(s) self esteem in the child.

Now fast forward to the way we parented our own children, did we use our parents  style or abandon it in favor of the new kinder gentler parenting, hovering helicopter friendly fun day parent…even if you are not, even if you are trying to instill core American work ethic values in your child, your child’s teacher is not.  Your kids teacher tells them that they are perfect(unless they are an American little boy of waspy descent). The teacher themselves may not hover but the system does; Spelling? optional. Math? new. Science? humanist religion….anyway I could keep goin on but…

Cause nothing says truth better than a stylishly made up and dressed woman, eating a cupcake while thinking about going on a diet, reading a book with sunglasses on indoors, by an author sure to impress her readers...

I think these are fine examples of the kind of crap…CRAP…that so many of you f-tards think are good ideas. I know that you do because I actually read a lot of your blogs….now to be fair most of the people who I am following are pretty funny and snarky* themselves, (even if they are a little more lib than I[and certainly more sane lol]) and there are I am sure countless blogs I have not found yet with like minded thinkers, but one of the reasons I have failed to find them yet is because I have to wade through so much Livin, Laughin, and Lovin and/or crazy New America Idealism that after awhile I snap and have to crank out some pissed off piece of post…

I mean personally I guess in the long haul, I don’t really give a shit, I’m nearing the end of my little run, I mean I f-d up a lot of it but it’s been fun, and I do understand that we meant (and you who still believe [mean]) the best…it all sounded so good, so right, so easy, but the evidence is in. It’s been fifty or so years in this grand experiment, the counter culture has become the dominant culture I should be celebrating, after all I’m one dysfunctional f-ed up piece of machinery only…the most tragic hilarity of all…I’ve come to see that society should not think like me…society needs to teach our kids that the easy way is the bad way.

The Builders of America

There is a reason that the culture that came to dominate and change  the whole world did so, and being kinder and gentler wasn’t one of them. There is a reason such a culture lifted all of it’s citizens (even the poor, minority and/or disenfranchised ones) into a higher standard (still) of living unknown in the world before then, and it wasn’t the government worrying about fairness…

Home of the Free and the Brave!

Am I saying that everything back in ‘ye old timey days was better? Is that what I said??  Read carefully, all I said is it’s time to admit that in many ways that are really important, our parents, our early American culture were right…hard work, sacrifice and long term planning will always get us ahead-don’t spend money we don’t have- judge someone by what they do, not who they are-sticks and stones may break our bones but names will never hurt us-ya can lead an f-tard to facts but they won’t see the truth-

Alright I made that last one up ’cause it was gettin a little boring, yes I know even I bore myself sometimes…what, you think I wanna keep talking about this crap…hell no…I wanna go back to being what nature and nurture seemed to want to combine to make me…irresponsible…but no…I gotta be this guy…the guy who keeps talkin’ bout personal accountability…just one more reason I’m Dysfunctional

Ya got complaints...Talk to the Chicken!!

Hello all again it’s me the ol’ Dysu and if you’ll forgive a little personal indulgence I just wanna finish up some business real quick…

Well, hopefully within this last post because I got plenty of other fish in the bucket, as it were…

Ac, ac, ac, again I am not sure where to begin. I went and looked and tried to find more info. I checked yer info page, read a number of your other posts trying to make sure there wasn’t somehow more to your argument, such as you were raised in an abusive household, grew up poor and in a rough way anything re: your age, schooling, personal experiences. I did read that you have traveled around this “awesome ball”. That implies you are a world traveler (whether that is true or not is unclear at this point) but what that specifically means regarding helping me define who you are I don’t know…

But from your posts, and your reply I am going to assume a couple things, forgive me in advance if they are wrong, but I did attempt to find the information out.

Unlike yourself, ac who was given the opportunity to learn something about the person before they assumed anything, but did not take the opportunity, yet cast their assumptions anyway…(But have you ever wondered if the very fact that you consider violence acceptable, and even preferable, might be a sign of the damage which you suffered as a result of your own childhood?) Oh it is to laugh.  I’m pretty sure I’ve spelled out quite clearly the damages I suffered as a child and the resulting effect it’s had on my life but….plus ya wanna keep your arguments to things I have actually said.

Here’s a little bit about me, so that ya know before you speak…

I was raised in an abusive household, on a physical par a little above average for kids of my generation, but physical beatings are not the only kind of abuse children can suffer. I left home for the first time when I was thirteen and ran the streets pretty much on and off again till I was nearly twenty eight. So I understand abuse and the affects it can have on both children and the adult victims of said abuse.

Later in life I studied psychology, as many abuse victims do, and came very close (practicum classes) to becoming a licensed therapist on his way to bigger and better things (until I realized I like to talk more than listen). So indeed I understand in great detail, not just from a practical experience pov, but the theoretical applications as well…

I have worked in the social service field* we’ll get to that below

I have helped raise four children, (even was househusband for awhile)and have tried (lol) more than one parenting style. Determined of course, not to repeat my own childhood, (and from a psych pov yes over compensating) I may have been to lax on disciplining my own children (who are for the most part God Bless ‘em pretty good human beings).

But again, then we are back to my original point and the point I feel you still have not addressed. You seem to want to claim that discipline is important, but you also seem to be suggesting that any “physical” discipline is akin to “beatings” and violence against children. You do this repeatedly, first in your original post, and now in your reply, the words violence and “beating” or “beaten” appear numerous times

Again I will repeat my earlier assertion that if what your saying is that adults should not “beat” their children, I think everyone reading this post is in agreement with you…calling your average swats on the butt to teach your persistent two year old that there are  consequences for going in the street “beatings”, that is what is debatable.

And this is where your logic is faulty, because one is true, does not make the other true. Because I swat my sixteen months old hand when she reaches for the stove does not mean I believe in beating my child (not something I ever did, but see the reasoning behind such things now, as my children enter adult lives lol)

Secondarily but equally as valid, is your logic issue regarding the outcome of said beatings. You seem to have a basic grasp of some rudimentary psychology, but it is, again, put to use in your argument in a way that is not only counter productive to your overall agenda, (having your readers agree with your assertion that hitting a child in any way shape or form is abuse) but unsupportable by actual facts.

You assert only the negative outcomes of such abuse on the adult victims. You state or imply, again both in your original post and your reply here to me, on numerous occasion about the long term effects of “violence” against children. But, even if I accept your original assertion that any form of physical discipline is akin to “violence”, than many of those who have suffered such “beatings” have gone on to do incredible things as adults. In fact you could almost say all of history (up until the modern “any physical discipline is abuse” years) has been founded on adults (including many great US Presidents)who have suffered such outrageous violence such as a “switching”.

But lets look at your argument one step further, even if  a child suffers terrible abuse at the hands of a parent (or any adult), there is no guaranteed outcome…just look at Oprah Winfrey….I could list numerous examples. I’m not saying abuse is good. Again what I’m saying is your logic is flawed, that’s all, because one thing is true, does not make the other true.

What I was trying to say, what I am still trying to say is make sure you have sound arguments and are definitive in your assertions.

After all this I am quite clear that you believe beating and violence against children is wrong, but I am still unclear whether you actually meananyphysical discipline is excessive, or ??

I mean I enjoy a good debate, it is one of the reasons I have chose to use this as a post instead of simply replying, but I like my opponents to come well armed as it were lol.

And here’s where I can help you. Where as I don’t believe in beating children. I do believe, have come to believe, and have seen evidence now on numerous occasion where some children deserve a good beating (*). Now that is obviously a topic you and I could debate, you bring yer facts to the table, I’ll bring mine…

If, again I will repeat myself to make sure my statement is clear, you just wanna say adults shouldn’t use capricious and unnecessary violence against children, I and every(sane)one else are on board.

But if you want to make the claim that all physical disciple is abuse, and that all abuse of children leads to violent adults (or even, less reasonable adults) the facts (not my facts but the facts) do not support your arguments and I will gladly debate them.

Lastly, like many young people, (one of the assumptions I am making that may be wrong[but I will be surprised if i am]) you assert on numerous occasions that it is this violence against children which teaches them to be violent, (not your fault, you haven’t been educated properly). That is why I called your theories ‘pop” psychology because it begins, is founded on the flawed premise that humans have to be taught to be violent, the facts do not support this theory and I am always surprised it still gets props in this day and age.

If you take two infants who have been raised by loving parents and place them in a room with one teddy bear(limited resources), a vicious fight is going to break out. So the express opposite is true, we have to teach babies not to resort to violence. And before you say it, the use of violence in this issue, from my perspective would be a capricious use of violence so…no, no rational thinking parents suggests using violence to teach nonviolence (though we (humans) use to (back in the days of yore) and it most cases that worked pretty good also, lol.

So lets review…

Are these things inherently intertwined or artificially associated

1. You assert physical disciple=violence\beatings.

2. You assert physical disciple=negative outcome.

3. You assert physical disciple=violent adults=recycled discipline= recycled violence

 

They are all a truth, but not necessarily the truth…get it.

So this is all I’m sayin, make sure yer arguments are cohesive, structured around sound logic and, hyperbole aside, factually founded, that’s all.

Lastly, lastly, when you believe corporations are out to get ya, the greedy rich are ruining the country, that alternative energies are plausible today, that 9-11 might be a conspiracy, and that babies are born as some perfect vessel (as compared to a living genetic being with it’s own blueprint and instincts for survival) of humanistic ideals well then ya’ seem kind’a like a hippie (a word coined by the American Beats meaning a little but hip). This is again my second assumption which I indeed am making in this post, only based on what I have read of your work, so forgive me again…

But you probably aren’t…you were just taught by one.  Anyway, I’m sure we pretty much can agree to disagree on most issues, but feel free to stop by anytime, perhaps we can discuss your limited, immature and somewhat ignorant views on slavery and racism…Oh it is to laugh.

I salute you sir!

 

 

 

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